I am a victim of crying when I’m angry. Not because of the situation, but because I analyze the consequences of treating people the way they treat me. I think about what could really happen if I follow through and retaliate an emotion built on a foundation of hate and frustration. Nothing positive can flourish from that reaction. There isn’t a benefit in being angry.
I used to get mad at myself for not standing up for myself. But looking back, staying quiet was the best option. My reason for staying quiet isn’t because I’m weak. Silence is a form of strength. If your argument is based on a present emotion, that’s dangerous. The next couple of hours you might not be as angry, but the damage has been done.
Also reacting out of anger doesn’t always get a point across, especially if it is directed towards a person that isn’t receptive. It would take more than just your choice of words to make them change their mind. We have to remember that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, thinking, and ways of doing things. If we think that for one moment we can somehow change that feature about them, and make them agree with us, then by all means keep arguing until you are blue in the face and have exhausted all of your positive energy.
The person that remains angry actually loses the battle. I’m willing to be that they will also spread rumors to make themselves feel better and get people on their side. Childish right?
Think about how anger makes you feel on the inside. It literally raises your body temperature, makes you want to fight, triggers the mind to a level of getting even or revenge. That mindset lingers and steals all of your productivity. Makes you look back and realize how much time you have wasted.
What can you tell me when you are shouting that will still be valid and important when you have calmed down? Usually nothing. If it is still important when peace have settled, then lets have that discussion like mature adults.
Until then, keep your anger over there, and I’ll do everything in my control to maintain a shield around my emotions.