Reflection…

image

My daughter was the one that noticed this reflection. She was jumping in the puddles, and started saying “you can see our building! It’s upside-down!”

She never misses a moment to simply ENJOY life. She pays attention to the small things that are beautiful, and that happens to have the most value… And guess what? It usually doesn’t cost anything.

I admire how she can find so much joy in playing with a box, or building a tent out of pillows and covers, or playing with her stuffed animals… Maybe some of that is the remedy for “the only child syndrome” (lol) but she makes it work, and can literally play for hours with these items.

Watching her and what makes her happy, and also taking the time to capture the photo above made me stop, smile, and appreciate things that are around me that I cannot change or control.

Having moved to Florida, I’ve slowed down a lot. Slowed down in the sense of “I DON’T have to leave the house everyday!” I feel like I used to literally stress over leaving the house. More often that not, my list of places to go would be extensive! I’ve mentioned it before, but I don’t have a standard “9-5″… but not having THAT particular structure means I’m making my own hours to leave the house to round up products to sell on Amazon (that’s in another blog someday).

But at any rate, I would feel so much pressure and stress to leave the house to:

– Shop for Amazon
– Go to the grocery store (plan, shop for, and prepare dinner)
– Go to the gas station
– Get “pooh” (that’s our daughter’s nickname lol) out of the house to play or whatever
– Go to the bank
– JUST TO DRIVE AROUND AND GET SOME AIR!!!!!!!

The do all of that in a hurry to try to beat rush hour traffic (which never happened), and to also get home at a decent hour, to TRY to get dinner ready so we’re not eating past 9pm (in many cases, dinner was done and ready to eat, AT 9PM!). I know, just a nightmare.

It was so hard to take a moment to breathe and relax, and to even recognize awesome things around me like nature and the moving clouds. My life was the epitome of stress.

The funny part is that stress (queue the gasp) is self-inflicted. No one can GIVE you stress, or make you feel stressed out. It’s all a matter of HOW YOU HANDLE WHAT YOU ARE GIVEN. It’s simple math:

a scenario + your interpretation = your reaction

Either your reaction will render you peace or anxiety. How do you filter it to give you peace in any situation? You have to want peace for yourself more than making someone else happy… ESPECIALLY if their happiness is going to make you want to pull your hair out using toothpicks until your scalp bleeds.

After my scenery changed, I realized that I can be a much better and well-rounded human being if I’m happy and relaxed. I can focus and feel like I have more time in the day if I’m relaxed. If I’m truly being honest with myself, I can just sit and read a book at home all day and be completely peaceful. It took a while to get to that point though without feeling guilty. You know the thoughts that “someone will be mad at me!”. I had to let those thoughts GO. And it’s not always easy, but it’s something to continue practicing.

Reflecting on my own image, who and what I want to portray now means NOTHING unless someone can see my true happiness even when I’m not saying a word. That’s my goal and new passion. I’m doing it for me, and also so I can be a better wife and mother. My family needs a person that is calm and can think things through. Not an angry lolly-gag that can’t even manage time.

If you are completely honest with yourself, are you happy? If not, what can YOU change to depend only on YOURSELF for your complete happiness?

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